Shitty Squirty Kitty

Have you ever felt of looked like this? ...you're not alone! Shitty Squirty Kitty is always squishy feeling down there. Have you ever eaten something and it flies right through you? ...you're not alone! Shitty Squirty Kitty to the rescue...

Sometimes I run, sometimes, sometimes I hide, sometimes i'm scared of you... but all I really want is to hold you tight and squirt it right, be with day and night. -Squirty Spears

Ever get the urge to fart or shart??? Some people love to shit and squirt! Who loves to take a BIG FAT DUMP? Which one is your favorite? Personally, I love the corn shit and the wet shit, but that's just me! :)

The Shit List:

The Ghost Shit
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit on the toilet paper, but there's no shit in the bowl.

The Clean Shit
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit in the bowl, but there's no shit on the toilet paper.

The Wet Shit
You wipe your ass fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you end up putting toilet paper between your ass and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

The Second Wave Shit
This shit happens when you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to shit some more.

The Brain Hemorrahage Through Your Nose Shit
Also known as "Pop a Vein in Your Forehead Shit". You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.

The Corn Shit
No explanation necessary.

The Lincoln Log Shit
The kind of shit that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.

The Nororius Drinker Shit
The kind of shit you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread mark left on the bottom of the toilet bowl after you flush.

The "Gee, I Really Wish I Could Shit" Shit
The kind where you want to shit, but even after straining your guts out, all you can do is ...

Saying Squirt Ya Later,

Sir Squirts A LOT! :-p

The Cat

The cat likes to sit at the sink in the bathroom and drink out of it.  Fine, no big deal.  But when she sits on the counter and stares at me while I take a dump...kind of weird.

Love The Diarrhea Diva xoxo

UnderEZ: Anti-Flatulence Underwear

Information taken from their website: http://www.under-tec.com/index.php

Under-Ease are underwear for protection against bad human gas (malodorous flatus) and are made from a soft air-tight fabric (polyurethane-coated nylon). To maintain the air-tightness, elastic is sewn into the material around the waist and both legs.
    A triangular "exit hole" for the flatus to be expelled is cut from the back of the air-tight underwear, near the bottom. This "exit hole" is covered with a "pocket" made of ordinary porous fabric sewn over the "exit hole". This unique design forces all expelled gas (flatus) out through the "pocket".
    Inside the "pocket" is a high-functioning, replaceable filter - the core of the technology. This multi-layered filter is made in a sandwich-style, and begins with the two outer layers of wool felt. The second two layers are made of non-woven polypropylene and spun glass materials. In the center of the filter is a single layer of activated carbon.
    The filter is then covered with soft ordinary material to allow for easy replacement in or out of the pocket. The underwear are washable and will last approximately a year depending on the frequency of use and laundering. Each filter will last from several weeks to several months depending on the frequency of use and laundering.


Love, The Diarrhea Diva xoxo